My Journal of a COVID-19 Year, Day 3: “Is it any wonder I have too much time on my hands?”

I walked to the store today. My local grocery store is about 2 miles away, so it’s an easy walk, though I usually take my car because it is less time consuming. However, this morning, I frankly wanted to consume time as I’m finding that I have quite a lot of it on my hands these days.

In California we are now on lockdown (a term that probably means something different to every official and civilian who uses it). People are encouraged to stay in their homes except for essential business, and only essential businesses are to remain open. The key word, of course, is essential, as your trivial is my essential. I read this morning that GameStop stores are saying that they are essential in these times, and who am I to argue? However, walking is still encouraged for the time being, and it’s nicer to walk outside on a beautiful morning like this than to pace like a caged animal in my house, pushing time along step by step.

Time is a concept that seems so obvious and clear to us until we start to really look at it. I was very intrigued by a speaker I heard once who suggested that the five senses that we learned as a child were not comprehensive and that among other essential senses we have is a sense of time. This suggests that though there might be some external reality to time, it really only exists through the interaction with our sense, our perception of the separation of events. Time may not be a constant, but an amalgamation of perceptions, or as Einstein said, “Time and space are modes by which we think and not conditions in which we live.”

If time is relative, then it is clear that perception of time can be long or short in relation to what is happening. All of which leads to today (boy, did that take a long time to get there) and the lengthening of time. So many of the anchors of our day have been taken away, and suddenly we are awash with time. This is particularly apparent for people who live alone. A day which has been filled with events and obligations and interactions with other people is suddenly pretty empty, as we redesign our day around new realities. For many, the obligations of job continue to have some hold, but I suspect for most that even these will drop off a bit in a week or two as we are finally given the time for which we have always been asking.

So what to do? One friend pointed out on Facebook that this is finally the perfect time to read  À la recherche du temps perdu, or maybe I can finally conquer Infinite Jest (a mountain I have approached on multiple occasions but never summited). Many are exercising using digital guides, trying to fend off “quarantine gut.” I was wishing this morning that I had fabric to make a banner, which I haven’t done in years, though I suspect that the stores selling these supplies would not be considered essential. I write my blog, I make a playlist, I nibble on projects for work, but a lot of the time I sit and think and feel, and time certainly creeps.

Take care of each other.