“Write about the Starbucks controversy.”
This was the most common suggestion I heard in preparation for these days. Clearly there was a lot of focus on this in the news, and social media went wild with comments.
So today I'll write about Starbucks and their subversion of Christmas.
Not the red cups…I've never heard anything more stupid than the criticism of the red cups. I'm drinking from a plain red cup today, and I have not felt the least temptation to renounce my faith or knock down a nativity scene. When I think about all that has been done and said about a cup, I wonder if Starbucks executives are shaking their heads in disbelief or rubbing their hands over the free publicity.
No, this outrage is not out front in the news, nor in the front of their restaurants, but if you look down while ordering, you will see a modest display for the Starbucks's Premium Gift Card. This sterling silver, limited edition gift card has the owner's name and number handsomely embossed and attaches to your keychain or purse. It comes with a $50 balance in an attractive (plain) red satin envelope…and it costs $200.
Interestingly, in each of the stores I first saw this display, the card was missing, supposedly sold out. But there was a brief description, the price, and directions to learn more a Starbucks.com. I went home and looked it up. Clearly with this hefty price tag this gift card must come with unbelievable benefits…year round pumpkin spiced lattes…table service by a talking alpaca…back rubs with every purchase. However, when I read the terms of service, there was no more than what I originally saw. The card offers you benefit of being able to spend money on coffee in much the same way that you do with a cheap plastic card (or with a free iPhone app).
I don't know whether it is more or less insulting that the card comes with $50, clearly establishing that you are paying $150 for a money taking machine (an anti ATM card). I suppose this is to prime the pump and get the money flowing through the silver. Do you show yourself as a person of distinction to baristas across the land? Who is this card for? Is it for the person who has everything, except more coffee?
I'm sure this is only the beginning of a trend. Next Christmas MasterCard will offer the Premium Statement, a solid gold coated papers embossed with everything you currently owe…for a mere $300 more per month…think how the postman will admire you as he strains with his artificially heavier load. The state will address its budget concerns with the Titanium Property Tax Bill for discerning home owners. Accruing and paying debt has never been more precious…metal
O, Christmas is a coming and the geese are getting…fleeced.
As always, I welcome your comments.
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There is also a premium refillable mug that is equally blingy and expensive. Also, if you buy the $40 refillable cup you get one free cup of coffee or tea the entire month of January. It’s too heavy for my taste.